Columbus Day: Celebration of Genocide, or just a reason to get pissed 'bout nothin?

Kevin Long
Kevin Long's picture

So it's Columbus Day, the day when guilty white liberals, folks with nothing better to do, And some Indians protest the discovery of America by a guy who never actually came here. If folks in the West Indes want to get pissed off, fine (There's the old Chris Rock gag about Columbus coming ashore, and some guy with a West Indian accent shouting, "Hey, you, get de hell off me lawn!"), but here?

My thinking on this is twofold:

1) It was more than half a millenium ago. If you're... going to get pissed off over things that far back, why stop there? Why not have a day to protest the sack of Constantiniple? Or Homo Sapiens wiping out Neanderthals (Excepting the ones we could use as sex slaves). Yeah, some bad shit went down, and yeah, it sucked, but dude: LONG ASS TIME AGO. Let it go.

2) It was going to happen anyway. Leif Ericson discovered America about 500 years before Columbus. He didn't feel it matched the drapes, so he went home again, but there are ample records of vikings in Greenland making occasional expeditions here to get lumber and stuff. And the first think the vikings did was kill three Indians who were taking a nap. There's a highly-mythologized story of St. Brendan who *may* have made it here 400 years before Columbus, but being a monk, he wasn't really interested in getting busy with the ladies, and went home again. My point being: It had happened before, and it was going to happen again. EVENTUALLY someone was going to get the idea to stay. Unavoidable. So....again: Let it go.

This should not be taken to mean that I take the plight of American Indians lightly. I don't. I've been involved in Indian Rights since the 1980s, it's kind of the one social issue I take seriously, what with me being married to an Indian and my kids being part Indian and all. That said: it makes no sense to protest this crap. Might as well protest the moon for being ugly.